19 Jun 2025

Devoted husband, Clive, remembers his wife’s bravery

“I picked Leukaemia UK because of the research work the charity is does for AML – not only to help people to survive, but to find kinder less harsh treatments. I am exceptionally proud of my wife, as throughout her various treatments and many ups and downs on this emotional rollercoaster she never complained. She bravely fought against this terrible and aggressive leukaemia disease but sadly lost the battle. We must continue to contribute and carry on that fight.”

For some terminally ill leukaemia patients and their loved ones, there will come a point when a heartbreaking decision as to whether to end gruelling chemotherapy is offered by doctors. Here, one devoted husband remembers that moment and his wife’s bravery throughout her three years of treatment.

Clive Osborne MBE met Doreen when they were both serving in the Army. After a whirlwind courtship of just six weeks, they were married on 4th October 1975 and were together for more than 49 years.

Doreen and her husband Clive on their wedding day

Doreen left the Army when she became pregnant with the couple’s first child. Clive continued his military service, including deployments in the Falkland Islands, Bosnia and Iraq, before leaving after 37 years’ service in 2010. He was awarded the MBE for Operations in Iraq from the Queen in 2008. When daughter Hayley and son Graeme were grown, Doreen, whilst still working, undertook an Open University Degree Course, which led to a successful career as an international business analyst. Clive helped his son open a CrossFit gym and helped with the management for a while, but in 2021 the pair were enjoying spending time together as a retired couple. It was in August of that year that Doreen first became ill.

“It started with a really intense headache that meant she had to stay in bed for several days,” said Clive, 69, who lives in Spalding in Lincolnshire. “It wasn’t getting any better so on 3rd September Doreen rang 111. They told her to go directly to A&E at Peterborough City Hospital as they suspected she had meningitis. She was immediately admitted and on 8th September we got the results of multiple tests. They found she had meningitis, a sinus infection, and an inflammation of the caecum, part of the digestive system. The underlying cause of all of this was acute myeloid leukaemia (AML). She was 66.”

Doreen was immediately put on medication for her meningitis and had an operation to drain one of her sinuses, which gave her relief from her headache. Preparations were made to start her on chemotherapy for her AML.

“The word leukaemia just jumped out at me and I felt extreme fear about what it meant. I didn’t understand what AML was or stood for, or its implications. When I looked further into it I quickly discovered that Doreen had a life limiting condition – the survival rates beyond five years for those between 60 and 69 were just 16%. We talked about it and remained determined to fight this leukaemia head on.”

Doreen remained in hospital for three months having two rounds of intensive chemotherapy.

“The consultant said ‘everyone with leukaemia gets infections Doreen but we didn’t expect you to have six at the same time?’! It was very tough on her – I was told afterwards she nearly died a number of times. There were times when I was sitting in the room with her and she didn’t know I was there. But they did manage to get the levels of leukaemia in her blood down. However after two rounds they decided to switch to a gentler drug treatment as it had been so harsh on her.

“Doreen was moved to the lower intensity chemotherapy Azacitidine in December and told she may need a bone marrow transplant at a later stage. She was allowed home in January 2022 with trips to the haematology day unit two or three times a week for her chemotherapy and blood tests. She perked up a lot at that point but the treatment schedule dictated our lives, we had to plan everything around it. However we had a two good years and we managed a holiday in our special place – the Cape Verde Islands, where we’ve been going since the 90s.”

Sadly in January 2024 a routine bone marrow biopsy showed a rise from 4% to 15% myeloid blasts – Doreen had relapsed.

“She was referred to Addenbrookes Hospital in Cambridge with a view to finding a bone marrow donor. She was given another round of chemotherapy which made her really ill. The consultant then said she was too poorly to survive a transplant. We both had to accept that option now wasn’t to be. We were both big researchers and would look up everything we were told. We didn’t talk about it much, but there was a mutual understanding that we both knew there was no effective treatment left for her AML.”

Doreen and Clive with family on their 49th Wedding Anniversary

Family and friends gathered together in the village café on October 4th 2024 to celebrate Clive and Doreen’s 49th wedding anniversary. The party was a surprise for Doreen and the café had opened specially on the Sunday.

“She wasn’t well and said she didn’t want to go out so I had to tell her about the party. It was a wonderful day. She struggled but in the end spent 4 ½ hours there with everyone.”

Doreen’s consultant recommended another form of tablet treatment through Guys and St Thomas Hospital in London which he said would extend her life for maybe six months. However he also talked honestly to her about the option to stop all treatment – if that’s what she wanted.

Doreen kept a diary around this time and on 21st October 2024 wrote:

“He advised if I had chemo it may add another six months to my life if I did not get anymore infections, sepsis, etc. If did not have anymore treatment it would mean my quality of life would be better as I get stronger but my life expectancy would be 2 – 3 months. This was a big shock to both Clive and I and something we needed to discuss at a great length.

On 27th she wrote:

Doreen with her son Graeme

“Hayley came I explained everything the doctor said and she said I had to what was best for me. She thought it better to spend more time at home with Clive than end up spending the rest of my life in hospital. Graeme said he would support me in whatever decision I decided.”

“We spoke about it together and spoke to the children,” said Clive. “There were a lot of tears. I said I’d support her decision of course whatever she wanted to do. She was losing a lot of weight at that stage, although she would still get dressed and get up every day.”

On 27th October 2024 Doreen told her consultant she didn’t want to have any more treatment. Palliative care was arranged at home via St Barnabas Hospice in Lincoln, but she was eventually admitted to hospital as she again became very ill.

“She went back into room 8 which was where she spent her initial first three months of intensive treatments after being diagnosed with AML. I think she was happier to be there rather than the hospice as she was familiar with her surrounding and nursing staff. I was with her all the time and Graeme and Hayley took turns. The nurses from the day unit who knew her so well came to say goodbye, which was very touching as we knew that meant it was nearly time.”

Doreen passed away peacefully on 16th December 2024.

Clive is now channelling his grief into an incredible fundraising challenge – making the 500 mile pilgrimage along the 1000-year-old

Doreen with her husband, son and daughter.

Camino de Santiago trail from the French border town of St Jean Pied de Port to Santiago de Compostela in Northern Spain.

“I’ve been physically fit all my life and done 25 marathons, but this will still be a formidable challenge. My son Graeme has put me on a fitness programme and I’ve spent a fortune on walking gear as I’ve only ever had running shoes before! I’m aiming for an average of up to 16 miles a day with my 11kgs rucksack on my back and it should take about 33 days from 7th August to 8th September 2025. Graeme will walk the first five days with me and my daughter Hayley the last five days, making it a family effort in memory of Doreen.

“I picked Leukaemia UK because of the research work the charity is does for AML – not only to help people to survive, but to find kinder less harsh treatments. I am exceptionally proud of my wife, as throughout her various treatments and many ups and downs on this emotional rollercoaster she never complained. She bravely fought against this terrible and aggressive leukaemia disease but sadly lost the battle. We must continue to contribute and carry on that fight.”

Clive Osborne is fundraising for Leukaemia UK